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We all have something we want to attract. Clients who feel like they were concocted in a you-specific lab. Relationships where you're free to display your quirks without explanation. A career possibility beyond this role you've outgrown.
This question is going to sound like a departure, but stick with me: Do you remember the first time you played with magnets? Their push and pull in your tiny, marker-stained fingers. It felt like magic, didn't it? But you were in science class.
And that's where we are today, as I share a few principles about magnetism. Less metaphysical, more Ms. Morrison sharing a lesson on the chalkboard. Class is in session.
Magnetism requires movement
Magnets look like smooth, still slabs of black, but there's a microscopic dance of electrons within. If you want to be a magnet, you have to move. Magnetism is not merely a mindset shift. It's an action. You research companies or answer truthfully to the question "How are you?" or design products with your dreamiest clients in mind.
Congratulations. You're creating a magnetic field. This internal movement is only the first step, though you might draw an opportunity or a person closer to you. I know how tempting it is stop here with your largely self-contained actions. But your true magnetic force only gets revealed through interaction.
Magnetism requires interaction
When we thank of magnetism, we imagine an interaction. Two magnets snapping together or pushing each other away like sibling rivals. A magnet drawing patterns with iron filings. The soft, scratchy sound of a magnet sliding off of the part of the fridge you thought was magnetic.
The only way to recognize—and potentially amplify—your magnetism is to engage. That project can't live in your head. You have to share it. Invite people to hangout. Then ask the questions you used to swallow. Visit environments you'd never imagined yourself in. You become a magnetic force as you broaden your interactions. Notice what comes nearer and what darts further away.
Magnetism attracts and repels
Unlike batteries and dipole magnets, people don't come with a + or - sign. If you want to be magnetic, you're going to both attract and repel. That's magnetism, baby. It's not a strategy for people only willing to be liked. Or for people who need to know exactly how things will turn out. You can guess at who or what is or isn't for you, but you can't fully control it.
When I mentioned this to my husband, Matt, his mind, unsurprisingly, made a basketball association. "It's like Caitlin Clark," he told me. For the sports-illiterate among us, Caitlin Clark is the WNBA's 2024 Rookie of the Year. Her generational talent and lack of melanin attracted a racist contingent within her fanbase. Could Caitlin control who she attracted? Nope. But she could've moved differently once she saw what came in. So can you.
Magnetism isn't some abstract, fatalist strategy. It's science, and it's available to you. Time to get moving.
I'm opening another round of You Did That!, three months of 1:1 accountability coaching and advising. We start in January. You can book a discovery call now.
